Finding Purpose From Pain

Everybody has a story, but finding purpose from a painful experience is often a challenge. The saying “life is hard” is sometimes, an understatement especially for those who have experienced a devastating loss, betrayal, illness, or injury. A dear friend of mine was living a normal life working as an emergency room nurse when suddenly she developed a rare balance disorder upon return from a cruise with friends. This neurological condition left her totally disabled, unable to walk, constantly dizzy, and sensitive to sights and sounds. She had to literally learn how to walk again.  Life literally changed in the blink of an eye…. She had to let go of her nursing career for a new life of medical appointments and rehabilitation, only to find out that her condition was incurable. One can only imagine the devastation, depression, and other mental health issues that came along with the physical challenges now set in her lap. My dear friend had to retire from nursing, and with that came the additional layer of grief with the loss of her dream career. As a former dancer, and as part of her rehabilitation after she mastered the ability to walk again, it was suggested by her medical team that she start dancing again. The hope was that through movement she would be able to stabilize her body’s nervous system and somewhat neutralize the constant dizziness that she experienced. And with that, my dear friend literally crawled her way onto a dance floor, somewhere she hadn’t been in a very long time and little by little, step by step, beat by beat, she started to heal her body through movement! Although her condition is incurable, today she is able to ambulate fully, dance like a professional, and engage in life with some adjustments and accommodations. She is now using her personal experience to teach dance, fitness, choreography, and artistry to help others!  She has found a purpose to her pain!

Similarly, I once knew a young boy, middle school aged, who showed much potential towards becoming a stellar athlete. He lost his father at the young age of 12, but given his passion for football, the sport itself carried him through those difficult middle school years.  His coaches and teammates became a second family and training for and playing the sport that he loved became his coping mechanism.  Entering high school, he knew he was on the “smaller” side when it came to the physicality of football, but, nonetheless, his passion kept him fully engaged in the rigorous training, regular practice, and learning the art of studying game film. Having completed an outstanding freshman year of high school, this young man started to consider a future of more competitive play, and thus, increased his off-season trainings to meet higher level of play demands.  Sophomore year had other plans, though, as this was when his first shoulder dislocation occurred, rendering him out for the remainder of that season.  This young man, though, was resilient, and he kept at it, with the help of a sports trainer, he was ready to get back into it for junior year, with college recruiting now a parallel process. Unfortunately, again, another shoulder dislocation put him out most of the junior year season… and again later in the spring of that same year, while lifting weights, the shoulder once again dislocated.  This third dislocation led him into surgery, with hopes of salvaging his senior season.  With college recruitment also in sight, this young man went through shoulder surgery followed by 8 months of rehab with a dream of having a great senior year followed by high hopes of being recruited for college.  However, once again, fate had other plans… At the first game of his return senior season, and during his first play of the game, the other shoulder dislocated causing extreme pain and heartbreak… it was then that he realized his football career was coming to an end.  He was devastated as one can imagine, but it was his head coach who walked him off the field that night reminding him that “football doesn’t define you”… giving this young lad permission to call for his retirement… but with that, came the grief and sorrow that was attached to losing his dream… much similar to the story of my friend. While out of the games that followed, the head coach gave him a video camera, a drone, and a side-line purpose of filming practices, games, and later announcing games.  It was at that very moment that this young lad found his purpose…  He took a liking to filming sports events and later to announcing games, editing, and even full-on live-stream broadcasting!  He found that not only did he enjoy it, but he also loved it!!  But if it wasn’t for the injury, he may have never realized this…  Today, this young man attends college, studies Mass Communications, and works for ESPN+ where he is developing skills and passion for sports broadcasting!  This young man is another example of finding purpose from his pain!

These stories are inspirational… people do in fact find their purpose sometimes by having to endure very difficult and painful life events. Although no one asks for painful life experiences, when they happen, and they do happen to everyone, we can take those experiences and grow from them… Growing into perhaps an even better purpose than what we ever imagined…

Pathways to Peace, Inc. was founded with this in mind… finding purpose after painful experiences…In fact, Pathways to Peace, Inc. became my purpose after my own extremely painful life experience. Pathways to Peace, Inc. https://www.pathwaystopeace.info/ is a mental health practice in Lake Mary, Florida, offering individual and family counseling  for various mental health conditions including eating disorders, anxiety, depression, divorce and family problems, and trauma. Although traditional “talk therapy” is beneficial, I have found that engaging in art and dance is another avenue of healing emotional pain.  By using artistic expression, we are channeling these emotions in a different and unique way.  The artistic process (whether it be through art projects or dance and movement, among others) allows one to connect the mind and body in a way like no other…  Creative arts programs allow for creative expression, regulating emotions, cognitive improvements, such as memory, as well as increasing socialization and decreasing a sense of isolation.

The Arts In Healing program in Lake Mary https://www.pathwaystopeace.info/about-3 is a bi-monthly program that uses art projects, choreographed dance, and musical lyrics to process mental health topics, difficult emotions, and challenging life events.  Embracing topics such as beauty and brokenness, self-worth, identity, self-love, among others, Arts In Healing enables emotional healing in a different and unique way.   Through this process, many find themselves creating a new path in life that enables a sense of purpose, joy, and overall happiness. Finding purpose through pain is an over-arching goal of the work we do at Pathways to Peace, Inc.

We are currently in our “This Is Me” creative arts initiative, embracing identity through the arts. For more information, call or text us at 407-867-1368 OR complete the “Contact Us" page https://www.pathwaystopeace.info/contact-us

Maria Nemec, LCSW, CEDS is the founder and president of Pathways to Peace, Inc.  Maria is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker and Certified Eating Disorders Specialist.  She is a member of the National Organization for Arts in Health https://thenoah.net/member-directory/#!biz/id/67f02519eb449b206709767f and a member of the International Association of Eating Disorders Professionals, Central Florida Chapter https://centralfloridaiaedp.org/about/